All over the world, people are very impressed with the latest Apple gadget, the little brother of the iPod, the iPod Nano. It’s very cool looking at first, but, looks can be decieving, huh Marc Summers? Here at Blue Damage Headquaters we were given an opportunity to try one out and give a review for our dedicated readers. Without further ado, here is why the iPod Nano Sucks (and it does a lot).
First of all, since it is so small you can’t even fit cds in it! How are we supposed to play music on this device without CDs? It just doesn’t make sense. We spent at least 3 hours trying to insert a CD into the iPod Nano, but, we were largely unsuccessful. We did what any person having trouble would do, we loaded up our copy of the internets and started searching. We found some solutions such as waving the compact disk counter-clockwise over the iPod in an attempt to transfer the files. Also, we tryed plugging our Sony Walkman (which plays CDs correctly) into the iPod to “record” the songs on the iPod. Both solutions were ultimately unsuccessful and we are still searching.
Secondly, it doesn’t fit in your pockets… in a pair of pants without pockets! How are we supposed to put it in our pocket if our pants do not have pockets! A few of our investigators at the office tried scotch taping the iPod Nano to our taint, but, it was very uncomfortable. The removal was even worse. It would be much more innovative if they created some sort of velcro that could attach to human skin. That way, we could place it anywhere on our bodies.
Finally, we had to load iTunes onto our Windows 3.1 machines here to “configure” the iPod. After waiting for what seemed to be 3 hours on a dialup connection, we tried to install iTunes. Big mistake. Before we knew it, it was closing programs left and right, shredding papers lying around the desk in a tornado-like fashion and causing the printers in the room to give us dirty looks and whisper anti-Semitics at us. It also started deleting our copies of the internets on the computer. This brought up an interesting fact. Apparently, the iPod Nano can delete internets unlike Mac computers which cannot delete or connect to the internet.
If this this whole review process wasn’t bad enough, Andrea Barber stopped in to see what the commotion was all about several times. All in all, the staff at Blue Damage had a terrible experience with the iPod Nano. For these reasons the iPod Nano sucks really hard. However, there are many other reasons that we didn’t even have time to cover today as we have a round table discussion on how to solve Global Warming.